BabnikLifeStyles

“Tell me whom you love and I will tell you who you are.” – Houssaye
This may go against everything we’ve been taught about being equal in a relationship. In my model, men and women are equal in relationship – but we freely choose to come at it from different ways.
Many years ago, when I was [...]

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Men don’t leave. They do the best they can to stay with the woman they’ve chosen, and only leave when they can’t get what they need.
So what do men need?
They need what women need: love, companionship, all the good stuff you dream of in a relationship. With one difference: Men respond to a woman [...]

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“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.”
– Ingrid Bergman
How did we get where we are?
Can you remember what it was like the moment you laid eyes on your husband or boyfriend, or last romantic partner?
Were you instantly attracted? Was he?

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There is power in choice. By not believing we have a choice in any situation we find ourselves in, we’re able to be
confused, feel dread, step in and out of commitments, get angry, disappointed, and create drama and conflict enough to distract us from the fact that we are afraid to choose.
Choice is completely different [...]

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If everything always turned out the way we expected, if every turn in the road led to where we thought it would, life
would be pretty dismal. Not only would we know about the good stuff, we’d know about the bad stuff. If we knew
everything in advance, there’d be no anticipation. Fear about the uncertainty of [...]

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Trusting your boundaries means you believe in your ability to take care of yourself, to treat yourself well regardless
of how you’re feeling about yourself, and to insist that you be treated well, no matter what your man or the conflicting
voices in your head may be saying to you.
Following your feelings means you focus on [...]

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There are many myths surrounding men. And I believe women have made them all up to avoid some basic truths:
The truth is – Men are loyal, brave and strong. Men have a tremendous capacity to love, commit, nurture, cherish, understand, support, and be there for us.
If  they want to.
And that’s it. Men, unlike us, tend [...]

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The tool of being able to return again and again to the positive, as gently as you can, works like a magic wand. You
can wave it over any moment of relationship conflict.
Instantly, you’ll see a way out of the cycles and patterns of anger and defensiveness that got you into trouble in the first place. [...]

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When you’ve filled the page (and perhaps more pages – on your computer or in a journal,) look over what you’ve written. Pick out 3 of your favorite observations. Circle them or rewrite them here:
An example would be: He touches me on my cheek and looks into my eyes, and I just melt. Or He’s [...]

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Even if you believe that you do know what you want – it’s the specific, sensual details of your desire that starts the
wheels in motion. Throughout this book, we’ll be using guided imagery and fantasy to help bring vague desires into
3-D wants you can actually see and feel.
Let’s start by imagining the perfect relationship Your [...]

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